test driving, yo.

[broil]

Have you accepted our lord and savior Satan?

Comments

[kaladanda]

[ slaps the back of his head and then returns her hand to the front pocket of her jacket ]

[broil]

Ow.

[His tone's as flat as can be.]

What, did I get the name wrong? I got the name wrong.

[Turns to a random stranger.] I'm sorry. Have you accepted our lord and savior Diana?

[kaladanda]

[ keeps walking, but stops when he turns to the guy who gives him a weird look. she, however, only rolls her eyes and sighs like you do when an annoying kid doesn't shut up. ]

Petre. [ i swear to the unholy seven u r the worst ]

[broil]

[But meeeeeeehm]

That's my name.

[he loves his name. Did u no]

[kaladanda]

[ yes, she's aware he does. unfortunately. sighs again but a little more humorously and tilts her head. come on, follow, u fatass ]

Any nausea yet? [ it's fun to make him her search dog sometimes because he gets weird whenever they're approaching something Very Holy and God-Like and Sacred ]

[broil]

Nope.

[fishes out a cigarette. click, light, smoke.]

But you know I'll give you a heads up when I'm about to hurl, yeah?

[kaladanda]

[ points away from her ]

Away from me this time, please, smartass. Or I'll stop buying you cigarettes.

[broil]

I only ruined your shoes once. [shows her a finger.] Once. And they weren't even nice shoes.

[kaladanda]

[ that's because she doesn't wear nice anything with the exception of her genuine leather jacket, and even so, it's been worn for so long there's the possibility there's a layer of dirt before you can actually see leather.

bumps her shoulder on his and fake laughs. ha ha ur funny ]

[broil]

Let me steal you some shoes. They'll be nice ones, the kind you don't throw up on. And I'm not even going to consider pink, I promise.

[drags on cigarette, blows smoke away from her.]

[kaladanda]

I like my shoes!

[ they're like. old shitty reebok white sneakers. old and dirty but still good. leave me alone u fashion freak. ]

[broil]

[looks at reeboks. looks at her.]

Serious question: do you hate yourself.

[kaladanda]

[ pulls hand out of pocket ]

[kaladanda]

[ slaps the back of his head again. ]

[broil]

[ahdgs jerks]

Ow again?

[kaladanda]

You're such an idiot.

[broil]

I said it was a serious question.

[But does she ever listen? NOooooo.]

[kaladanda]

Very serious. [ rolls her eyes ]

[broil]

So serious you can't even give me a straight answer. I'd look into that, Di. I charge sixty bucks an hour if you wanna take a seat and tell me about your dreams.

[kaladanda]

What can I say, I'm a mysterious personality. It adds to my charm. [ very flat, kind of lazy, adding a bit of a jazz hand to mock him

stops in front of a café house and points to his cigarette ] Put that out. I wanna get a muffin.

[broil]

[Whateva, he was almost done with it anyway. He looks at her, sucks in his lips to lick them and flicks the ciggy away. Won't even put it out with his shoe, what a douche.]

You are a muffin, muffin.

[What. Idk. Let's just go in.]

[kaladanda]

What? [ what. ] Why are you such a weirdo?

[ wonders if he was like this before she reshaped him. sometimes she feels bad for having done that to him but it was either that or leaving him to die alone

sometimes she thinks it would have been better ]

[ she's going to get a muffin and so much coffee ]

[broil]

[No, no it wouldn't. He's grabbing this second chance at living with teeth and nails, girly. If he has to serve the Devil while he's at it, then let it be that way. A deity is a deity is a deity, this one just happens to have nicer perks.

And the company isn't so bad.]

All that coffee's gonna drown your brain.

[kaladanda]

[ the company is terrible. but he hasn't gone down to Hell yet so that might be it. diana has been there and it was not very good. would not recommend. then again she probably has it worse because the devil steers her around like a pawn ]

That's fine. [ maybe it'll drown the demonic voices screaming in her brain that sometimes she's assaulted with ] You want anything?

[broil]

[Who needs demonic voices in your brain when you have one right in front of you. And anyway... he's not exactly eager to go take that trip to hell so soon. Corrupting humans right here is fun, yo.]

Can I have a ginger ale?

[Meeeeehm.]